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January 23, 2019

This is Thirty…

For the longest time, I hid my age. When someone asked me how old I was, I would change the subject. It sounds so silly to me now.

Why? I think when it comes to women somehow it seems like our value goes down as we get older or there is some type of shame with admitting your age. Overall, I made my own assumptions based on beliefs that were mostly in my head. When I heard someone say, “I’m 25, I’m old” I would cringe because I was obviously older but now I just want to laugh because it’s not old.

Here is the truth, I am 36 and I am really proud of that number.

Here are the reasons why:

I have let go of the belief that age is a bad thing. As cliche as it sounds, age is just a number. You are as young as you feel. If someone in their 60’s can do an Ironman then I think we are all good to the abilities that we allow each other to have. It’s a matter of conditioning yourself to what you can and can’t do. Do you feel old or not? It’s up to you.

I spent the majority of my 20’s figuring out who I was. What I wanted to be, etc. I had two very long relationships. I put myself after the person I was dating. Accommodating my life to their choices and not making my own.

I spent my twenties exploring different careers. Had a lot of different jobs. I modeled and Dj’ed which brought me a lot of satisfaction because it allowed me to be creative. But I wasn’t sure if this was something that I could do long term. So I stayed in my comfort level.

It wasn’t until I was in a bad relationship that I finally woke up. Left Arizona and moved to New York on May 1, 2012. I was a fish out of water to say the least. I had to fend for myself or it was back to Arizona. Failing was NOT an option.

At first, I waited tables (I had never done before) until I could find a good job. I was really hungry to make something of myself. The stress from not finding a stable job started to take a toll on my health, I’ll talk more about that in another post.

First winter in New York

Somewhere in the middle I started a food blog where I posted every now and then but never fully committed to it.

Meanwhile, in my personal life, I dated people that were not a good fit. I think anytime you have to wonder about the other person you should really run for the hills. It’s much better to be with someone who you click with and you just know in your gut that its meant to be. When I met my husband I knew that day that he was the one for me, as crazy as it sounds.

The reason I gave you this long post about what my life has been like is that it has been a journey (tacky, I know). Most of all it been a learning process and it’s something that I am proud of. I have overcome the curveballs that have been thrown at me and I also feel like I have taken good care of myself in the process to really own where I am now.

First summer in New York

I am a wife and mother. Holy responsibilities!! Now it’s not just about me it’s about being a part of a family. The adjustments in the past year have not been easy. It’s been hard sometimes and I just have to keep my head up and figure things out. When someone asks me how old I am, I am happy to say 36.

I am in a point in my life where I really want to embrace my creativity and share things that might help others even if it’s something as simple as finding a new place to check out. It’s something that I enjoy and I want to puruse.

So my point is, love your age, love the lessons you’ve had because they happen for a reason. Maybe you just had a bad breakup or you didn’t get the promotion you wanted or whatever it is. Take the lesson and be grateful you sill have tomorrow to figure it out.

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